When it comes to goals you set for yourself, it’s common to struggle to stay motivated. At first, it’s usually easy because you’re excited about it but after a couple of weeks, or maybe even just a couple of days, your motivation declines and you might have trouble sticking with this new habit.
We make our best decisions when our logic and our emotions are in check, so when you start to feel tired or frustrated and your emotions goes up, keep in touch with why you committed to a goal in the first place. This will balance out your emotions and your logic when you’re feeling unmotivated.
One of my clients wanted to build his habit of going to the gym. When he went to the gym and exercised he felt more energized the next day, he focused better at his job, and just felt better overall. In the beginning, it was easy for him to stick to his new habit of going to the gym after work.
But after a couple of weeks he lost motivation. “I just can’t get myself to go there. When I drive home after work, if I turn right, I go to the gym. If I go to the left, I go home. Every day I think, ‘Yes. I’m gonna go to the gym today,’ but I find myself turning left to go home after work.”
So, we came up with a list of the top 100 reasons why he should go to the gym and he taped this list to his car steering wheel. Every day when he got in his car after work, he’d read over the list and it reminded him of all the reasons why he should go to the gym, how it would help him mentally and physically. This list increased his motivation to keep going, even on the days when he didn’t want to.
I had another client who wanted to get rid of a habit. This client used to go out after work with her friends whenever they’d ask her too, and then she’d end up staying out too late so she was tired the next day. So, we came up with a list of reasons why it was okay to say ‘no’ to her friends on a work day. Before she’d answer them when they’d call, she would read over this list that would remind her “I’ll be tired. I’ll struggle to get up in the morning. I’ll be frustrated during work, because I can barely stay awake.” This exercise helped her to say no more often.
Come up with a list of the top 10 reasons why you should stick with a specific goal that you have. Then when you find yourself struggling to stick to that habit or change you want to make, read over that list. It can increase your motivation so that you’ll stick to it and be more likely to reach your goal.
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Amy Morin is a psychotherapist, a lecturer at Northeastern University, and a mental strength trainer.
She’s a Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and international bestselling author. Her books, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do and 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do, have been translated into 32 languages. Her next book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don’t Do, will be released in December of 2018.
With more than 8 million views, her TEDx talk, The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong, quickly rose to one of the top 25 talks of all time. She was named one of the top 100 leadership speakers of 2018 by Inc. Magazine, The Guardian dubbed her the “self-help guru of the moment” and Forbes refers to her as a “thought leadership star.”
